I know two “kidadults.”
The first is my friend’s 21-year-old sister. She is just living at home while she goes to a college that is 15 minutes away from their house. I think that’s OK, but the second person is just slacking off. He lives at home because he doesn’t have a real job, or even see a need for a real job, because his parents are able to completely care for him financially and in other ways too. My mom says this is getting too common. She said that if I live at home after I graduate from high school, I have to pay rent. Everyone who knows about that says this wrong, but I think that it is fair.

It’s the parent’s fault though. It is thier job to give thier children a sense of direction, discipline, and maturity. My parents made me and my sister sweep floors for 5 cents until we could afford a 50 cent chocolate bar. My parents were involved in our lives and were our role models. They taught us right from wrong. They shielded us from media that would expose us to unhealthy messages.

It’s true that housing is very expensive these days and good jobs are hard to come by. But that’s no excuse for taking responsibility, even if it is more difficult to do say today than ever before. Come hell or high water, I was determined to move out of my parent’s place,despite my wage and rent costs.

I often feel I am one of the very few real “men”I know. None of my male friends have any serious plans of gettting married and being a father. It’s embarressing the male gender that too many malse are too busy playing video games than rising to the challenge of being a husband and father. Those are role I proudly aspire to.

Given the distances to be driven and the lack of public transport in rural areas in this country a driving licence is almost a must at 16.

At the same time, it is as equally an adult and responsible undertaking as all the above activities. Taking responsibility for peoples lives and having a say in the running of our country, what can be more adult than that?

Given that people (”kids”) expect, nay, demand, the right to these adult activities then surely it must folloby extension that they are well accepting the rights and responsibilities of being adults AT THAT TIME.

If you wish to be treated as an adult……………………then act like one. what could be simpler.

My “kids” and grandkids know we are here to help them up if they fall down and that our home is their home if they are down on their luck and need some breathing space. Just phone ahead so I can get the beds ready.

But, we struggled to educate them and worked hard to instill work ethic and a sense of responsibility. Stand on your own 2 feet and we’re right behind you all the way…..

Now some of them are telling us that life is too hard and they may have to go without some luxuries. Umm, it’s not OK to stay at Mummies breast until you are 30 or 35 or “have found yourself” (you were never lost!) and Mummy and Daddy have needs as well.

I don’t want to hear people carping and complaining about not being able to instantly afford the 4 bedroom executive home or the 2 bedroom flat (apartment) and glossy new car when they are wearing designer clothes, saving for holidays and there are starving children in the world!

Nor do i want to hear them complain there are no jobs available when what is on offer is below their “dignity” or qualifications. These are spoilt brats who want it all handed to them on a plate.

As a retired employer I can tell you that my first choice with job applicants would be the person with the quals who took a job sweeping streets and kept applying and applying for the job/career they REALLY want - that person is the one who knuckles down and takes responsibility for themselves and understands that life is not a bed of roses, someone responsible that i could rely on. Not a “nancy” who would fold at the first sign of adversity or pressure.

40 is the new 30 - what a load of tripe!

2.) Do you think the idea that adultescences is a time for young people to be irresponsible and carefree is any sillier than the idea that adolescence serves a similar purpose? Why or why not?

I think that is exactly the purpose of adultescence… to create an even longer span of time that growing up can be procrastinated…

While I think it is ok for parents to let their kids stay with them when they grow up, I dont think their parents’ house should be allowed to be treated as a place where they can live and just be reckless and irresponsible… it should be a place where they can stay until such a time as the he can support himself enough financially to live on his own.

Maybe Americans will finally be completely grown up when we are old and decrepit and in nursing homes… but then again, some other intermediate stage will probably be invented that will give old adults the excuse that they too can be irresponsible and carefree like they were back when they were “adolescences” and “adultescences”. (that is supposed to be a sarcastic paragraph)

~Elisabeth J. Gruber