rebelling against low expectations

How do you share about Jesus with someone who doesn’t want to be “preached” at?

H

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  • Hmm… difficult. I would say, try two things: asking questions and sharing your life.

    ‘Preaching’ gives the impression of non-stop talking. That can by avoided by asking questions. Getting their point of view. “So, Jack (or whatever you’re friend’s name is), what do you think about all the different religions in the world. Are they essentially the same? Are there any that are different?” Or “What has been your experience of Christianity?” Etc, etc. Perhaps that will give you a gentle transition to being able to share about Jesus. At least it might get them thinking.

    Share your life. Bring God into your stories of your day. And always remember: actions often speak louder than words. “Preach the gospel always; if necessary, use words.”

    Cassie

    • I disagree about your “words are necessary”, Sam. We are supposed to be like Jesus, right? If you will notice, very rarely did Jesus come right out and preach. Most of his “sermons” developed from the answers of other people’s questions. Most of all he just led by example. I think that is what we should do as Christians. Don’t get me wrong, if they have questions we should answer them, but don’t go overboard or they will stop listening to anything.

      • Great insight, Sam! The phrase has wonderful intentions; we should absolutely lead by example and do our best to reflect Christ with our actions. Unfortunately, I think that people sometimes use it as an excuse to not saying anything at all, and you can’t share the Gospel without words!
        God bless! 🙂

        • Yeah my youth pastor said something about that quote once and about how words were definitely necessary. I was just thinking about that the other day, actually! I agree…I guess with our actions we’re showing people what Jesus’ character is really like and then with our words we’re telling them about His message and the salvation He offers. It’s definitely a balancing act!

      • But what if, if you just stop talking they’ll think it proves their point more that God isn’t real? Like if you’ve already started talking about them, but all they do is shoot you down…if that makes sense…

        • Well, I may sound as if I am contradicting myself, but as Grant Bingham said “all things in moderation”. What I mean by not going overboard is talking about Christ so much that they shut us out.( I say “they” and “us” meaning non-believers and believers in general.) I do it so I know others do it also, but when somebody talks to me constantly about the same thing I naturally shut it out. I made this mistake once trying to bring someone to Christ and I think I led him away from Christ. My Dad used this as an example. My least favorite food is Chili (but to better picture this use whatever you least like). He told me its like shoving chili in my face and saying “Eat it, it’s good for you”. My point is, they may not be ready to be the next Billy Graham. You can’t be teleported to the other end of the path to Christ; it’s a walk. Teach them slowly by being an example without being a priest and condemning everything they do wrong.

          • Yeah, I wish I had thought it through more before talking to them. I didn’t over talk to them about Christ or anything but they didn’t take any of it seriously and at the end I pretty much just felt like an idiot. I wish I could continue speaking to them about the truth but it’s too late now…

      • I understand where you are coming from, bmac. The very first passage I thought of was:

        “Behold! My Servant whom I uphold, My Elect One in whom My soul delights! I have put My Spirit upon Him; He will bring forth justice to the Gentiles. He will not cry out, nor raise His voice, Nor cause His voice to be heard in the street. A bruised reed He will not break, And smoking flax He will not quench; He will bring forth justice for truth. (‭Isaiah‬ ‭42‬:‭1-3‬ NKJV)

        This is true, but (my favorite conjunction) at the same time there’s:

        And He said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature. (‭Mark‬ ‭16‬:‭15‬ NKJV)

        So my two cents on this is: all things in moderation, actions, preaching, etc. let’s not go overboard with preaching, or with our actions. And lastly I’ll say, make sure your Walk lines up with your Talk.

    • Very true, Sam! Please note, I did not intend to mean that ‘words should be used only in a tight spot’ or something like that. I think the phrase intends to communicate the importance of actions, not a lack of importance of words. They both have their place; they are both absolutely necessary. Actions can often speak louder, but we definitely need words too. That Peter verse is one I certainly have had drilled into me (and that I absolutely agree with!). We must must indeed be ready to give an answer for the hope that is in us.

      • I think the thing we’ve all struck on here is balance. Actions and words both have their place. Both are necessary.

    • I would object to the statement that words are necessary to sharing your faith. (But I would, I’m almost a total non-talker). You can share your faith by showing the love of God to those who need it. It’s the ultimate non-preachy way to witness. If I were a non-Christian, I highly doubt that I would be won over by any amount of words.
      Just sayin’.

  • If a friend reacts to you trying to talk about Jesus by saying they don’t want to be “preached at”, this is what I would suggest: Tell them that if they don’t want you to share your faith with them, you understand and respect that. However, explain that Jesus is the most important thing in your life–in fact, He IS your life. So, while you understand that they don’t want to be “preached at”, it’s only reasonable that, from time to time, you’d want to talk about the most important thing in your life–Jesus. And if they see the logic in what you’re saying and agree with you, you have an excuse to talk about Jesus with someone who doesn’t want to be “preached at”.

    I don’t have a lot of experience in this area, so I’m looking forward to what everyone else has to say!
    God bless,
    Christy

  • I think that if someone is upset that you are “preaching at them” then they aren’t going to listen to what you have to say. Maybe instead of trying to explain it all to them and lay it out there as one big presentation of the gospel, just live your life in front of them. Now, this takes work!! Just living your life however you want to isn’t going to be very impactful. Live your life so engrained into Jesus that they can’t be around you and not hear about Him and see Him in you because He is so much the center of everything you are!! My prayer for my life is that when people are around me, Jesus is so in control of everything I am that they don’t see me at all – they only see Jesus! That is a hard journey of surrender that last your whole life. This will grow you so much as well as be a witness to your friend. Live your life so that they can’t help but wonder. Pray for them diligently. Pray that God burdens your heart to pray for them. Pray that one day they will understand. God is the only one who can open anybody’s eyes. And be ready when they ask questions. Know why you believe what you believe and why you act the way you do or say (or don’t say) the things you do – and let that answer be Jesus.

    1 Peter 3:15-16 – But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.

    2 Peter 3:8-18 – But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. But the day of the Lord will come like a thief. The heavens will disappear with a roar; the elements will be destroyed by fire, and the earth and everything done in it will be laid bare. Since everything will be destroyed in this way, what kind of people ought you to be? You ought to live holy and godly lives as you look forward to the day of God and speed its coming. That day will bring about the destruction of the heavens by fire, and the elements will melt in the heat. But in keeping with his promise we are looking forward to a new heaven and a new earth, where righteousness dwells. So then, dear friends, since you are looking forward to this, make every effort to be found spotless, blameless and at peace with him. Bear in mind that our Lord’s patience means salvation, just as our dear brother Paul also wrote you with the wisdom that God gave him. He writes the same way in all his letters, speaking in them of these matters. His letters contain some things that are hard to understand, which ignorant and unstable people distort, as they do the other Scriptures, to their own destruction. Therefore, dear friends, since you have been forewarned, be on your guard so that you may not be carried away by the error of the lawless and fall from your secure position. But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and forever! Amen.

    John 13:34-35 – “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

  • What everyone else has said is good, and maybe my idea works in conjunction with the aforementioned concepts. Sometimes it’s a good idea to step back. The thing about “preaching” is that it often makes people guilty, skeptical, or angry, and sometimes there’s not a lot that you personally can do to change that. BUT there happens to be, you know, a God in charge of the universe, and there may come a time in the future where an opportunity will present itself that allows someone to listen without feeling threatened. It doesn’t work for all situations, of course, but as others have said, if you take the opportunity to live as a Christian example, adding a little bit of time to the equation may make future conversations possible.

  • A really great book on this subject is Out of The Salt Shaker, by Rebecca Manley Pippert. I think the very best way to share Jesus with others is by living a life submitted to Him. He will shine right through you to the world around you.

    Sometimes I think we worry too much about details and obstacles, thus making us ineffective Christians. If we concern ourselves with denying our flesh and living in the Spirit, He will indeed take care of the details and obstacles.

    It’s also worth noting that those who come right out and say they don’t want you to preach to them obviously have a spiritual sensitivity. They’re at a critical point and prayers for their hearts and our mouths is essential.

  • Those friends are the hardest to get to, if they aren’t willing to listen it’s near impossible. Luckily, we’ve got God on our side! So my suggestion is this:
    1) If they are willing to discuss religion, even if they aren’t willing to hear what you have to say, then you can try to ask questions. Figure out what their world-view is, where they are coming from, analyze them. But remember to be their friend while doing this, they’re much more likely to listen/talk with you if it’s a friendly talk instead of “that annoying religious dude/girl”.
    2) If they aren’t willing to discuss religion at all(which has been my biggest problem at my school), then you just have to pray to God and be their friend. Likely this closed attitude stems from bad experiences with Christians. My friend had a ton of experiences with hypocritical, racist, and hating Christians. She is very strongly post-modern and follows the “freedom” crowd quite tightly, so racist, gay-hating, hypocritical Christians ruined it for her. My group of friends and I just loved on her over the entire school year though, and by the end of the year she commented that we really made a difference in her view of Christians. She’s not entirely open yet, but the strategy seems to be working with prayer, so that’s what I’d suggest if you can’t talk with them about anything religious.

  • For years my Mum talked about God to an Old lady called Betty, who we all loved,
    but Betty never listened and one day she slipped over and died. We hope she called out to God in her last hours.
    So you should always try to make them listen to you when you tell them about God, no matter what.
    ~Renee

  • You could tell the story of Jesus (or something else) with different names and places, so they get really interested with out telling you to “get lost” and when you have finished you tell then that it was the story of Jesus and see if they have any questions, or just leave them to think about it. 🙂
    ~Renee

  • So I’ve never been one to “preach”. If asked to speak, I will do so gladly! But to share the Gospel with someone, it can be so awkward. I prefer to work with people after they have accepted Christ. Personally, if someone started ranting about me needing Jesus, I would be turned off. But what I have found effective (along with my friends) is simply living it out. If we show God’s love by what we do, they will notice something is different. Then they will ask questions. That opens up an opportunity to dive in without being awkward. And don’t give the whole “you need Jesus” thing. Just share what God has done in your life.
    Another way is finding a common ground. In Bible class we have been reading the book of Acts and you can see that the Apostles share the Gospel, they start with something those people know. If they were talking to the Jews, they would give a brief Old Testament run through and then show them how Jesus fits in. If it was with other Gentiles, they would start with something they could understand. It’s harder but it works.
    Also, don’t think it’s going to happen all at once. Some people can be told about Christ and believe a few minutes later. Others, it could be years. I have a friend that went to a Bible camp for his whole childhood. He had some amazing Christian mentors and great Christian friends. He graduated high school and I was worried because he was going to be moving away from these influences but he finally accepted Christ. He saw something different in us. We didn’t push it on him. We just lived it.
    Hope that helps!

    God bless,
    Hana

    • Hana, you said, “don’t give the whole ‘you need Jesus’ thing. Just share what God has done in your life.” May I suggest that both is probably better? Testimony is awesome – the ‘God has done this in my life since I turned to Him’ or whatever story is certainly fantastic. It really displays the greatness of our God and that Christianity isn’t just some wishy-washy concept, but a life-changing truth. However, I also think that everyone needs to know they need Jesus – and why. What is our testimony based on at the very foundation? A God who died for us to take the punishment for our sins. People need to know the fundamental gospel – from creation, to the fall, to redemption.

      I love your point about finding common ground – definitely an awesome way to start sharing. And yes! It probably won’t happen all at once. The journey towards salvation is just that – a journey, with many steps.

      Blessings,
      Cassie

      • Cassie,
        You are so right about your testimony. What I meant about the “you need Jesus” thing is when people try to push it down your throat. That’s what turns a lot of people away. But sharing our foundation is essential. A lot of people don’t like to be told that they are wrong so starting with that may put up some walls. Once their more open, it becomes easier to share that Jesus died for us to take away all our wrongs! Just so amazing. But for someone who doesn’t want to be preached at, telling them that may be a hard place to start.
        Thanks for your input!
        In Christ,
        Hana

        • Yes, you’re right. Pushing the ‘you need Jesus’ thing down someone’s throat is probably not a good way to start. 😛 Thanks for clarifying, Hana. 🙂

          Blessings,
          Cassie

  • I used to feel so responsible if people wouldn’t hear the message of Christ. I finally learned that only the Holy Spirit can cause them to repent and believe. My responsibility is to be equipped with the knowledge of the Word, filled with love for the lost and the wisdom to know when the time is right. And be careful that when you witness that you are in right standing with God yourself, as a lost soul seems to be able to spot a hypocrite a mile away.

  • I think personal stories are really effective. My mom always says people can’t argue with a story from your own life. You are telling them what God has done your life, what you have seen Him do; no one can say it didn’t happen! If you tell them how good God has been to you, they’ll want the same for themselves. Everyone is searching for something to free them, to fill them, to satisfy them. Jesus is the only Person Who can do that.

    Asking questions is also great–it really makes people think. If they can’t answer it right away, they’ll likely be thinking about it later. The enemy wants to keep people from taking time to really think and evaluate their lives, because he knows it leads many to finding the truth. If we ask good questions, it will lead them to think about what they believe and consider whether they are on the right path.

    If you are trying to defend your faith or end up debating different issues with people, some good books to read are Ask Me Anything by J. Budziszewski and The Case for Faith by Lee Strobel.

  • There are critical things you must have and avoid when sharing the gospel. Communication and Authority. After starting a christian club of my own at my high school, quite a few challenges have arisen due to people who feel they deserve answers, but aren’t willing to be “preached” at. Dozens of regular non-christian attendees constantly ask questions, and I don’t know how to answer them all. What I have learned through the last few months is that it takes just one person who is committed to providing answers. All my (non-christian) friends used to ask a good friend of mine for “answers” about faith and religious topics, and all he did was give them resources and things to read and study. (bible verses, devotionals, etc.) When he did I noticed something, something critical was absent in his approach of “preaching to them.” Communication.
    They wanted to talk with him… they didn’t want to read the Bible, they didn’t want to embark on a Christian mission. They wanted to talk. Each one of those friends that he talked to lost their interest in the Lord, and any fire that burned was extinguished with two words… “read this.” The intrigue in their eyes just went off. From my experience I’ve learned that the best way, in my opinion, to approach them with an open persona, ready just to spend time with them and answer their questions and search for for answers together.
    The thing that must always be avoided is Authority, in the realm of spirituality, there is only one Authority… GOD. This same friend that just gave resources and not one-on-one time with them, also possessed an authority over the aspiring christians. Whenever they asked him a question, he reacted with a “I know the answer and you don’t” tone. He also didn’t want non-believers to come to my fellowship group. He thought that they were unworthy of joining us, unworthy of being part of a christian group because they weren’t Christian. According to Jesus we are to be “fishers of men”, inviting and on the same level as the non-believers. Us Christians have a job, that job it to approach non-believers with love, kindness, humility, and truth. I pray that God be with me, my friend, and all christians placed with this immensely important job, the job to be “fishers of men.”

    • Wow .. well said. Jesus reached out to the ones that were considered not worthy, and He calls us to do the same. I gotta commend you on starting a Christian club at your high school; that’s awesome.

    • Yes, I agree with you! Communication is important, when you talk to them it makes them feel they are being cared, they are important, you care for their frustrations and questions and you try to seek an answer together with these questions. It is important to be approachable, to have a friendly attitude 🙂

  • So, my family ministers at an abortion mill and we get a lot of heated conversation and ‘I don”t want to be preached at about all this jesus stuff!’ I guess you just kind of ket the Lord lead in some situations. Also I was reading in Matthew this morning and it said ‘out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks’. If your heart loves Jesus then the overfilling of your love will be the gospel. Keep in mind that we are talking about eternal souls here though, and while you should not feel responsible for their souls (you are not God) you should know that they need the gospel whether they want it or not!

  • Share your love to them and be kind to them. If they see how you act and treat people, they’ll want to know more and they will ask questions. Depending on the person and how they will react, bring up God every now and then in your conversations. Say how he has changed your life. After all, “God is love,” so one of the best ways that you can share Jesus to others is by loving them.

  • I have a friend who is an atheist. He’s my best friend, actually. I’ve never felt that lecturing him or being “preachy” would help anything. Instead, if the topic of religion comes up, I add to the conversation in a way that I think glorifies God and invites my friend to be curious instead of being accusative. He’s respectful of my faith, and I try to be respectful of his lack of faith while still trying to help him understand mine.

    • Could you expand on how you “add to the conversation” please? It would help, as I’m in the exact same situation.

      • Most atheists/agnostics pride themselves on logic. When the topic of faith comes up, it’s usually a question of the logic behind faith in God or lack thereof. My friend and I are close enough that I can directly question his logic, kindly, without upsetting him. Our last conversation, for example, was about the assumption that the burden of proof falls upon the one with faith. There’s a fallacy he brought up to emphasize his point, called the “Teapot fallacy”. The premise is that stating that you can not prove that there is no God is as logical as saying that you can not prove that there is a teapot floating somewhere in space. So if the argument is about a teapot, then the one who claims that there is a teapot in space is the one who has to make their case. To me, it’s a ridiculous comparison, but I went with it because it’s well-known in the atheist community. I made the case that while I have faith in God, he has faith in something. That something is not an entity, but he has faith in the lack of God or in modern science and evolution. By arguing that point, I was able to find out that he doesn’t have complete faith that there is no God and he admitted that he does have faith in science. I don’t remember how the conversation ended, but we were both able to understand each other a little bit more and I think I was able to show him that faith is as logical as lack thereof. Does this example help at all?

        • It does, thanks! The only thing is I have to kinda tiptoe around my friend because although we’re close and comfortable around each other, he has depression and I really don’t want to say anything that might push him over the edge. This does help though.

          • I understand, it’s such a delicate balance at times. In that case, I would try to lead by example. Maybe mention God when it’s applicable, and see where that leads you.

  • Actually, I think it’s pretty simple. Don’t preach at them. I mean, not right away. If they are someone you see pretty much all the time, like friends and family, just show Jesus to them through your actions and words. If it’s you are doing street evangelization I’d say just smile, say, “Ok, but you’ll be missing out on something that could change your life.” or something like that, and if that doesn’t work, I guess all you can do is pray for that person and walk away. And then pray more later. 🙂

  • Help! I need to have a serious talk with my sister (7 years older than me) about how her life is. She’s living with her boyfriend, and she thinks she’s still a Christian. So, this is a little bit off-topic, but I’ve been realizing that silence is implied agreement and I need to talk to her about all of this. Please pray!

    • Is this your first comment??? Welcome to the Rebelution, @mimeforjesus:disqus!! Glad you found us!!! 😛

      • Thank you 🙂
        Eh, I’ve gotten apathetic about it… not a good thing. She seems happy. (I’m making a face as I type, but you can’t see it…) It’s hard, because she and I connect really well, but she and I can’t understand each other on the deepest level. I can’t understand why she’s fine with where she is, and she doesn’t get why I make decisions like I do… like changing my aspirations from working in a Spanish-related field to trying to get into acting. Actually, come to think of it, we haven’t talked in a while… Anyhoo, it’s not going so great. I want to keep my relationship with my sister, but I keep thinking of that verse in 1 or 2 Corinthians where it says “Don’t hang out with those sorts of people” (MimeforJesus translation right there!)
        I respect your opinion… what do you think there? And I’ll get you the reference for the verse!

        • Been thinking about this for a while…couple questions for you:
          Does your sister respect the Bible? You mentioned she thinks she’s still a Christian but is obviously living in sin.
          OK maybe that’s just one question. 🙂

          So I read the verse you posted in context, and that’s definitely something to consider. But, she is family, so I don’t know if that changes things…
          Honestly, I’m not sure what else to say…I’ll see what your answer to my question is. 🙂

          • Okay, so I think she still respects the Bible. For obvious reasons I haven’t felt like asking her… and it’s kind of understood between her and my parents that she can talk to us kids, chat, everything like that, but she’s not supposed to counter their beliefs/teaching so she never brought it up.
            But when I was talking to her yesterday, I mentioned a debate I was having with someone about a morality-related issue, and she mentioned the Bible as if she still thinks it has merit. I don’t know how much she respects it, but there is a little bit of respect, at any rate.

            I know that her being family would make it much harder… but Jesus also said He would set brother against brother (or sister against sister, in this case)…

          • Hey @mimeforJesus! 🙂 I heard this really thought provoking question from a very mature, godly person that you could ask your sister. So it goes like this (I’ll add a possible set of answers): Of all the knowledge of the world and of the universe, how much do you think you know?Uumm, less than one percent probably.Ok, so out of the 99% of all knowledge in the universe that you don’t know, do you think it’s possible that something might be there that’s more fulfilling and more satisfying than the life you’re living now?I guess there might beWell can I help you find that knowledge? (Or something to that effect. Then talk to her about Jesus’ infinite love for us, or however the Spirit leads. Hope this helps, and I’ll pray that you can reach your sister!

          • I’ve typed and deleted like three different things lol, I can’t decide what to say…maybe if you have the opportunity, have a candid talk about why she thinks that she can be a Christian while living in unrepentant sin. Make sure you know scriptures about immorality (Proverbs 5, 1 Corinthians 6:9-10, etc). I agree with most of what Seth Yoder said, but don’t just talk about “Jesus’ infinite love” – if you were living a life of sin, which would make you want to repent more: “Jesus loves you no matter what you do” or “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand, and the day of the Lord will come like a thief in the night. While people are saying, “There is peace and security,” then sudden destruction will come upon them as labor pains come upon a pregnant woman, and they will not escape. Do not be deceived…the sexually immoral will [not] inherit the kingdom of God. (Matthew 4:17, 1 Thessalonians 5:2-3, 1 Corinthians 6:9-10) Just saying….

            Hope this helps!

            Josh =)

            Oh, and pray your rear end off, too lol. =)

          • Thank you 🙂
            I’ll keep you updated…
            This will be pretty hard, but I know it’s the right thing to do.

          • Thanks! I’ll be praying! Remember He hasn’t given us spirits of fear, but spirits of “power and love and self-control”. If I can do anything while being halfway across the country, (haha) tell me, ok?

          • Actually, you can do something from across the country (and actually, you’re not really… You’re in Georgia and I’m in the MD/PA area). Anyhoo… You can make sure I actually talk to her. I know I need to, I know it’s the loving thing to do, but I really don’t want to rock the boat of our relationship. I’m kind of the only person she talks to in my family as it is; she’ll email my mom sometimes, but that’s about it.
            So if you can check in on me in a week or so, that’d be great 🙂 Provide accountability from a distance 🙂

          • It’s been a week or so!!! =) Have you talked to your sister (jc is this the same sister who’s a voice major named Mo that you mentioned on revive?)

          • So I was texting her and we got to talking about Easter stuff; I really don’t know what to say. I think that she has rejected most of Christianity; I don’t know if she’s still holding on to any pieces of it. So yeah, that’s where I am right now. I’m planning to email her later and follow up on our text conversation.
            Nah, this is the sister we call Lilla… Again, I don’t know why we call her that. Her name doesn’t even start with the same letter! Nicknames are funny things… I was Glow for a while because one sibling couldn’t say “Laura” very well… we had Mo, Joe, and Glow 🙂
            Mo is living at home and taking college; Lilla is 600 miles away 🙂

    • We need to remember that we are told to preach the word, not do the saving. God does the saving.

      I have two older children. My son lives with his girlfriend and my daughter is gay. They both preach Christ? Go figure. But I can assure you that if a person knows Christ and they are living this way, they are aware of it. God gave the Holy Spirit to tell us when we are doing wrong – and He does His job!

      Please keep in mind that we all sin everyday and no one sin is bigger than another. How would you feel if someone showed up at your house everyday several times a day and pointed out your sin. Knowing Christ, we are very aware of the sins we commit even if they are not public.

      Think about the consequences about confronting someone else’s sin. Would they get mad and not contact you as often? What would that do if they walked away from anyone who they don’t feel comfortable with? It’s easy for God to be pushed away and the human thing to do. If you move them from the presence of Christ, how will they have Christ?

      For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. 3″Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? 4″Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye? Matthew 7:2-4.

      You don’t have to be ok with the behavior, but really – is it our job to change someone else’s behavior? They will stand before Christ in the end, we will not stand there for them.

      My advice is to have the continual and present show of God’s love and pray pray pray. Let God do the saving. And if God is moving you to say something, make sure it’s God – and cover yourself and the situation in as much prayer as you possibly can!

  • Hi! This is my first time writing a comment here at this website. I really want to participate or to join in this significant discussion. 🙂

    When there’s someone who doesn’t want to be preached at about our Lord Jesus, what I usually do is to pray first and then make friends with him or her, show I cared about him/her and tell him/her that if she/he needed anything I’ll be happy to help. 🙂

    I know he or she will start wondering why am I doing it simply because that’s what friends are for. 🙂 And the inspiration for all of it is our Lord Jesus. His Grace overflows, and His Light cannot be covered, it should shine. 🙂

  • I know that most of you won’t get this message, because the latest message on this discussion is a month old… but here goes.

    I have been living in this house for almost eleven years now, and for just about that whole time, I have had the same next-door-neighbor. He is one year older than me, but we play stuff outside together all the time, even now. Just yesterday we were playing basketball with some of our other neighbors, but that’s getting off topic.

    Anyway, he has told me before that he and his family are Christians, but by the way they act most of the time, I wouldn’t call them that. It’s not that they are mean people, in fact, they are possibly some of the kindest and most hospitable people in the neighborhood. However, I’ve never really heard them talk about God, or why they believe they are Christians… I don’t even know if they know what being a Christian is.

    Of course, I want them to spend eternity in Heaven with Jesus and me, but I can’t seem to get through to them. I’ve tried a few times to tell my neighbor whom I play outside with about Jesus, but he hardly seems to listen. Once, I asked him why, and he told me that he has been hearing that sort of stuff his whole life. I don’t know what to do. I have just about infinite times to share with him about God, but I don’t take them. I know time is short, but I’m afraid he won’t listen. I’ve tried talking to my other neighbors, and they listen more, but I still am not sure if I’m going anywhere. I’d like some advice from other Christians teens. Do you have any to share with me?

    • I have run into this same problem with other folks, and all I’ve found I can do is to pray. It seems like so little, but it’s really a lot, and you can prepare for when he asks you why you’re so different. I know, that’s not very helpful…

  • Live the gospel, be and example and show kindness to them and eventually, no matter how long it takes, they will wonder what makes you different

  • That’s the thing, don’t preach at them. It’s always good to talk to them about God and what it means to be a Christian, but always make sure your words align with your actions.
    Don’t be so narrow minded and shallow, because that’s how a lot of people think about Christians. When you don’t fit that stereo type, people can’t help but see how He has worked in your life.

    • Thank you. This is what I needed to read today. I’ve got a friend who told me a decade ago he liked me because I was his only Christian friend who didn’t “preach at” him. It’s bothered me for a long time, but I did my best to be a good friend without preaching at him. I’ve been praying and hoping more this past month that God would work in him. I really needed a reminder today that I may not be in his life to say the right words, but just to act in love.

  • My dad likes to say “Always tell people about God and if necessary, use words.” By that he means to live your life in Christ, and people will automatically open up their minds to you.

    You can’t exactly talk to someone who doesn’t want to listen.

rebelling against low expectations

The Rebelution is a teenage rebellion against low expectations—a worldwide campaign to reject apathy, embrace responsibility, and do hard things. Learn More →