rebelling against low expectations
I felt so small. Sitting in the Starbucks at a hospital, I watched white-coated doctors, blue-scrubbed nurses and busy-looking people come and go. So many people flooding so small a section of the massive building. Each one so confident, knowing what to do and where to go. And me? I just sat there feeling the inadequacy of my 5’0” self. Drowning in a sea of people, in a world too big for me...
There are some people who just seem impossible to love. Maybe it’s the bully at your school who puts others down to make themselves feel better. The brother who can only focus on himself, never recognizing the needs of others. The girl on Instagram who posts notes of self-hatred and threats of self-harm. The reality is, these people are hurting. They may not always understand what’s wrong with...
I’ve felt the suffocating grasp of anxiety.I understand the unexplainable panic that pounces unannounced, the heart that refuses to stop racing, the sensation of stabbing pain in my stomach that doesn’t make any sense. From the time I was an elementary schooler in orchestra practice, I would run to the bathroom to soak my flushed face in cold water; each week I’d dread going and come back...
In my youth group, deep friendships abound and a genial attitude is the standard. But sometimes, in the midst of a large conversations, I start to drift off by myself. Whether I was actually left out or I said the wrong thing or for any kind of self-perceived rejection, I feel like I’m not as good as everyone else. I’m not as special as them. I’m not as wanted or needed or valuable. And that’s...
I hate it when I mess up. If you’ve ever had a mosquito hover in your face, you’ve probably faced the question, “Why would God make such an annoying, stupid creature?” My mistakes, also annoying and stupid, leave me with similar thoughts: “God, why did you let me say something so stupid?” or, “Why did I have to act like that?” I may never know the purpose of a mosquito, but after much experience...
There are some people who are undeniably brave. Missionaries traveling to a strange country, dedicating their lives to minister to unreached people. Translators spending years to learn a foreign language and bring the Word to hungry souls. Martyrs dying for their unashamed confession that Jesus is Lord. And then there are people like me. People who don’t have anything impressive to show. People...
Today, I saw The Greatest Showman. For weeks, I’ve been bombarded by the barrage of trailers and posts about it. Then I stumbled upon the soundtrack. Suddenly I found myself swept away into its world. I didn’t even know the story, but the music was so powerful and I just had to see it.After a few days, I realized I had a problem. My interest had turned to obsession as the music played in my head...
Trees are tossed out on the curb. Stockings are taken down from the mantel. Red and green decorations disappear one by one until all that is left is the brown grass and bare branches stretching out to a gray horizon. Christmas has come and gone, and with it, the joy of many dissipates into the cool winter air. As Christians, we’re not supposed to let that happen. We’re supposed to have joy all...
Just love yourself. The empty anthem rings across my generation promising peace, fulfillment, and joy. Culture embraces it, as many of my fellow Christians do. But I wouldn’t touch it with my pinky finger while wearing a hazmat suit. Why? If we do a couple inches of digging, we’ll find that this self-glorifying, self-focused philosophy doesn’t have Biblical roots. In fact, I believe the message...
There I sat in a cramped hotel room with my family, sobbing uncontrollably for what felt like an hour. The flood of emotion came tumbling down on me unannounced. I was humiliated, having hardly ever cried in front of anyone before. But considering the circumstances, I should have been more prepared. Earlier that afternoon, we arrived after a seven-hour trip through mountains and cornfields...
rebelling against low expectations
