It was 9pm on Sunday night when I got the devastating email:
Unfortunately, I am not able to offer you a part in this production.
My stomach clenched and I felt like I was going to throw up. I had worked on my audition piece for weeks. I had even gotten called back for the perfect part that I desperately wanted, the part that seemed to fit me so well. I had been looking forward to possibly joining this production for weeks, even eliminating other extra-curricular activities in order to make room in my schedule for the possibility of being in the play.
Yes, I was devastated, because my dream had not been fulfilled, but I had two choices. I could put my faith and trust in Christ and his plan for me, even though things had not gone according to my plan. Or, I could choose to angrily blame God for not letting me get a part in the play. Really, when things don’t go as planned, we have two choices:
To Trust God
Providentially, before this “news” came to me, I had been meditating on the verse Romans 8:28. I had always thought of this verse as one of those overused Christian clichés that people like to throw around when something bad happens.
But this time, the verse hit me hard. Romans 8:28 says, “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” God works all things together for good. Does that mean I can trust him? Indeed!
That doesn’t mean that everything will go exactly the way we want it to! In fact, it can often signify the exact opposite. It means that God will bring into our lives what will give us the greatest opportunity for growth and bring him the greatest glory.It means that God will bring into our lives what will give us the greatest opportunity for growth and bring him the greatest glory. Click To Tweet
So often before my audition I had prayed, “Not my will, but your will be done Lord Jesus.” But did I really mean that? That would mean that I trusted his will more than my own.
I was forced to ask myself,
“Do you only trust God’s work in your life when he gives you what you want? Do you just trust him on the mountaintops and not the valleys? Didn’t you pray for his will, not your own, no matter what that would mean?” I needed to choose to trust his plan when it seemed to be different than mine, because his plan is best.
The second part of the verse says, “For those who are called according to his purpose.” We are called by the King of Kings! He has a purpose for our lives! This part alone gives us hope. If God wants me to pursue my dreams in the field of acting, he will make a way! Whatever God has planned for my life, he has a purpose for me, and I can trust that.
Or Not To Trust him
All of this sounds great. But so often, following Christ is easier said than done. I often become overwhelmed with my own desires for myself that I forget to trust God’s plan for me.
As a mentor reminded me lately, we can often view God as getting in the way of our plans for ourselves. We get angry when our plans get “messed up” by God. We are like a silly little toddler who beats his fists and has a temper tantrum because his parents said he couldn’t eat a small piece of hard candy, because they knew he would choke.
You see, trusting God’s plan for us isn’t always very easy. However, God knows what is best for us, even though it doesn’t always seem obvious why he chooses something for us. If we don’t trust him, we can end up depressed, angry, and losing sight of the purpose God has for us in the here and now. If we do trust him, we will experience peace and purpose.You see, trusting God’s plan for us isn’t always very easy. However, God knows what is best for us, even though it doesn’t always seem obvious why he chooses something for us. Click To Tweet
So, the question is, “To trust God or not to trust him?”
I think that I will choose the first option.