“I am tired of moving around. I am tired of saying goodbye. I am tired of this ache in my heart that won’t go away.”
Finally alone, I let myself cry as I expressed my feelings to the Lord. After all, I was passionate about my faith and desired to serve God. I was ready to follow Him wherever He might lead.
But here I was, moving to a strange place, serving the Lord in a new ministry–for the third time that year. I was sure I was following the Lord’s leading, but the loneliness I felt was overwhelming.
In each of my previous homes, I had fully embraced the people with whom I lived and worked. I loved them. I had held nothing back. So when it came time to say goodbye, I felt like my heart would break.
Now, in a new home and ministry, I was afraid to open my heart again. “Lord I can’t handle loving these people just to lose them. I can’t do this again. It hurts too much. My heart needs a home,” I cried.
Your True Home Will Only Be Found In Jesus
As I struggled with these things, I realized something. Until my heart finds its home in Jesus alone, these feelings of loneliness and loss will follow me wherever I go.
As long as I live on this earth, I will have to say goodbye. I will move or others will. As long as I find my stability and comfort in anything other than Jesus, the ache will go on and on.As long as I live on this earth, I will have to say goodbye. I will move or others will. As long as I find my stability and comfort in anything other than Jesus, the ache will go on and on. Click To Tweet
I thought back to a hike through the mountains the year before. The trees had amazed me. Hundreds of trees were growing into the side of the mountain, their roots growing deep into the rock. As I looked at those trees, passages of Scripture began to come alive in my mind.
Colossians 2:6-7 says, “Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him, rooted and built up in him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, abounding in thanksgiving.”
We are to be rooted in Jesus just like those trees are rooted in the mountain.
I was reminded too of all the times throughout Scripture where Jesus is called a rock. We are to be rooted in Jesus, who is our Rock. He is solid and unchanging. Everything in our world may change–but Jesus will not. If we are rooted in Jesus when the storms of life come, we will not be moved.
What Are You Rooted In?
As I cried out to the Lord, I realized that much of the pain I felt was because I wasn’t rooted in Jesus. Too often, I am rooted in relationships or routines. I find my stability in people. The problem is that when those relationships change or end, or when I move or others do, I lose my stability. Only Jesus can provide stability that lasts.
He calls us to be rooted in him, because it is only when we are rooted in him that we will be able to stand strong and steady in an unstable world.
So here I am, still far from home, still lonely at times–but learning to be rooted in Jesus.
I often view these trials as bad. But the reality is that they reveal that I am not rooted in Jesus and then give me the opportunity to cast myself on him.
I think of those trees rooted in the mountain. They are unmovable and unshakeable. Though storms may come, they will not be destroyed. They have sunk their roots deep into the rock. As a result, they are solid and stable.
I want to be that way. I want to sink my roots into Jesus my Rock and be grounded in him alone.