rebelling against low expectations

How do I respectfully disagree with authority?


R. WRITES: Whether it’s my parents, my pastor, or my teachers, sometimes I disagree with what my authorities are teaching/saying/doing. How can I disagree with them while still respecting the authority God has given them over me?

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  • Before you do anything, you should take into consideration the point that you disagree with. Is it biblically sound? Why do you disagree with it? And be open to what authorities have to say, even when you know your view is correct. Perhaps suggest that you disagree, and maybe give a reason why, but don’t argue with authorities. Or simply keep your view to yourself. I can’t say I’ve dealt with this issue much, but hope this is helpful advice!

  • The only tip I can think of is that if you disagree with someone about something and think it’s important enough to discuss, talk to the person in private instead of telling them you don’t agree in front of your class, church, family, whatever.

  • So, above all else you should seek truth. Find what God says about whatever authority is saying. Then go from there. Make sure you obey what God says, and don’t let you’re own “wisdom” get in the way. He knows everything, He is the one who discerns what is true. Also, always bring love into the situation. Remember to love whoever you are disagreeing with, and correct out of love, if you are going to correct. Hope this helps in some way!

  • I think it’s very important to be humble. I definitely think that it’s important to think about why they believe what they believe and why we believe what we believe. That’s not to say that were always wrong and their always right, but if they’re authority its always helpful to consciously contemplate their side.

  • Everyone has really good advice! I would also like to add: Search your motives for why you disagree with them. I find myself often disagreeing with people for the simple reason that they bug me. They might have gotten on my nerves, done something to me in the past, or may just be an irritating person. A funny example is, when I was younger whatever my older brother did or said I would disagree with. If he liked the color blue, I hated the color blue. If he wanted a sandwich, I wanted pizza. While this was partly just being an annoying sister it was also a sort of rebellion against my brother. It has played out as I’ve gotten older and I’ve really had to hold myself back and really honestly ask myself Why am I disagreeing about this? Do I really truly disagree with her/him or am I just being a rebellious teenager? I also believe that me and my fellow generation tend to have the general belief that we know everything about everything. Because of this I know sometimes our authorities will wipe what we have say off the dash board. Sometimes we have to pick our battles. That’s not always easy but I think it’s just what comes with being a teenager of the twenty-first century. This is what I’ve learned and I don’t know if it applies to what you’re struggling with, but I hope it helps someone.

  • This is hard.

    God has given them some level of authority, but he reserves the highest authority for himself, so you can always take your disagreement to a better judge. Go to the Word, see what God actually says and live by that — not just what you want to think, or because (whoever) says it’s true.

  • This is really hard! I sometimes disagree with my parents and I have learned that when you disagree with someone you should do it respectfully (not getting mad or raising your voice etc… ) But you should do it in love and tell them calmly why you are disagreeing with them and if its something biblical, you mentioned that you disagree with your pastor. You should find some verses that support you and with what your disagreeing on. Don’t disagree with someone in front of a lot of people ( you don’t want to embarrass them or yourself ) Instead do it in private and call them out on what you have an issue with, you never know they might have a good reason for what they are doing. But most importantly do it in love and with a cool head. I hope this helps!
    Bekah ( )

  • It doesn’t matter if you are right when you’re not in the right.

    Slippery road ahead. Proceed with caution.

  • This is what I do whenever that happens: I say in some way that’s not snotty or something like that that I disagree. We talk about for a little bit, then I end up agreeing.

  • Don’t forget that, as children, we’re called to obey our parents (unless they’re asking us to do something against God’s Word). I’m not saying that you can’t ever (respectfully) disagree with them, but we do need to obey them. So, if we disagree with our parents about something they ask us to do, and it’s not against God’s Word, then we can state our opinion and discuss it with them (respectfully), but we’re still called to obey them and do what they asked us to. And we should be open to listening to them and to understanding why they want us to do that, not just dismissing them because we don’t agree.

  • I totally agree Sarah.
    God has placed our parents and other authority figures over us for a reason. He tells us “Honor your father and your mother, THAT IT MAY GO WELL WITH YOU, and that you may live long upon the land the lord your god has given you.” That verse says it all. God loves and gave us authority to help and shape us. We can disagree with our authorities, but remember they want what’s best for us, and we have to honor what they say.

rebelling against low expectations

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