rebelling against low expectations

I Wanted To Be a Missionary


I was a little girl who read missionary books like they were Nancy Drew mystery novels.

I spent Saturdays reading through the biography of my choice. I could be Amy Carmichael, smuggling girls from evil temples, or Elizabeth Elliott bravely facing tribe men who murdered my husband. I read Kisses from Katie, and dreamt of saving orphaned Ugandan children.

I wanted to be a missionary.

I babysat, I pet sat, I sold home-made baked goods from a wagon at the end of my street. I planned to visit Julie in India, the missionary my church supported. I imagined flying a plane over the sea, smelling Indian spices, seeing alleys overflowing with garbage, entertaining little brown children with shining eyes and white smiles. I planned to share the gospel. I resolved to shine Christ into all the nations.

I was determined.

But my door closed.

God said, Not Now, Wait.

I had to be patient.

I would pray to God, “Why don’t you send me? Why can’t I go? I want to share your truth! I want to make disciples of all the nations!”

Not now, wait.

“But you gave me money to go, God. People were generous, your church has been faithful.”

Not now, wait.

My family moved nine hours away.

I didn’t want to move. I had friends at my local church and homeschool group, parents that I babysat for, children that had stolen my heart. I was excited for the new adventure ahead of me, but the unknown of what was coming made me hesitate.

I’ve lived in the Florida Keys for three years now. If I had just known then what God was planning in sending my family here.

God sent my family to support a pastor who was so discouraged by his ministry.

God sent my family to make my Dad a bi-vocational pastor.

God sent my family for the people of my church home.

God sent my family to be missionaries in this place that is far from God.

God Sent Me Here for a Reason.

You don’t have to go to India, Uganda, or China to be a missionary. Right now, where you are. God has you there for a reason. If you are a Christian you are a missionary because you are called to share His word, to share the gospel! Scream it from the mountain tops! Don’t be ashamed of the truth you live by. Be obnoxious in your Christianity. Be bold. Be the alien. Be stubborn in preaching Christ.

Ezekiel was called to be a missionary to the Israelites.

“And he [God] said to me, “Son of man, go to the house of Israel and speak with my words to them. For you are not sent to a people of foreign speech and a hard language, but to the house of Israel — not to many peoples of foreign speech and a hard language, whose words you cannot understand. Surely, if I sent you to such, they would listen to you. But the house of Israel will not be willing to listen to you, for they are not willing to listen to me: because all the house of Israel have a hard forehead and a stubborn heart. Behold, I have made your face as hard as their faces, and your forehead as hard as their foreheads. Like emery harder than flint have I made your forehead. Fear them not, nor be dismayed at their looks, for they are a rebellious house.” Moreover, he said to me, “Son of man, all my words that I shall speak to you receive in your heart, and hear with your ears. And go to the exiles, to your people, and speak to them and say to them, ‘Thus says the Lord God,’ whether they hear or refuse to hear.” (Ezekiel 3:4-11, emphasis added)

God sent my family to a different town in my own state of Florida. Not across the world to India of foreign speech and hard language, but a town that would be devastated by a hurricane.

Irma ripped through the Florida Keys. Irma left people in deep devastation, lost people. People with hard foreheads and stubborn hearts. God works through catastrophes. God works through hurricanes.

You are not going to see on the news how many people came to know Jesus because of Irma, Harvey, or any other hurricane, but God knows. If God wants my house flooded and my home streets filled with mountains of debris, let it be for His glory. If hurricanes bring people to Him so they won’t burn in Hell for eternity then praise God. Praise God because His plans are greater than my plans. Praise God because He is good.

Whether they hear or refuse to hear I resolve to be a missionary for Jesus.


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About the author

Haven Asnip

is a home schooled eighteen-year-old. She loves living in the Florida Keys and enjoys salty air, palm trees, and sailing. The Reb.deeply encourages her in that other teens around the world are striving to glorify God with their lives and preserve the world from sin. In return, she wants to encourage you to be bold for Christ! To find out more about Haven, check out her blog at Haven Asnip.


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  • Wow, that’s rough. I wanted to be a pastor for a while until I realized that women can’t preach. 😔 I get it. But it’s good that I can’t preach because then I can devote my time to writing more and helping spread the Kingdom that wat.

    • Maybe you could focus more into women’s ministry, or a young girl’s bible study. God can still use your passion for preaching even though Biblically you shouldn’t teach men. Just look at Nancy Leigh Demoss, or Pricilla Shire. They are both very gifted women’s leaders and teachers, but still within the bounds of scripture. They have also both written several books 🙂 You could use both your passion for teaching and writing to spread Christ. 😀

    • Thank you Grace!
      Yes, America needs Jesus. The sad thing is so many Americans think they have him only under a false notion of what they think being a Christian is. They have no relationship with Jesus. 🙁

      • That is so unfortunately true. 🙁 And it’s sad that there’s so
        many false Christians also because they give the world a wrong view of what Christians are supposed to be like.

  • Haven, thanks for the reminder! I am going on a week-long mission trip to the Dominican Republic in a few months. As I get more and more excited for the trip, I need more reminders that there are people right here, right now that need to see God’s love and grace! This was a great article!

    • Thank you for reading, Katelyn! 🙂
      Oh, that is so exciting that you are going to the Dominican Republic! You’ll have to write an article about it after you get back. I’d love to hear how it goes!!

  • This was a really good article, Haven! I’m glad that you’ve seen the good in all the challenges you’ve been facing and that you’ve chosen to praise God in the midst of them… and I’m proud to have you as my friend 🙂

    • Thanks Olivia! I’ve definitely had my moments of being angry with Him too. It’s just that being angry gets me nowhere except a whole lot of heartache.
      I’m so thankful for you Olivia 🙂

    • Thank you for reading Ashley!! It wouldn’t be nearly as encouraging for me to write if I didn’t have such great friends to read it. Thank you for your sweet words. 🙂

  • Haven, you are a sweet girl with an even sweeter spirit! I have no doubt you will do great things for the Lord!

  • A great article! I remember hearing something about being missionaries anywhere, not just certain places. Thank you so much for sharing this!

By Haven Asnip
rebelling against low expectations

The Rebelution is a teenage rebellion against low expectations—a worldwide campaign to reject apathy, embrace responsibility, and do hard things. Learn More →