rebelling against low expectations

Why Are Guys and Girls Different?

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In philosophy, there is a phenomenon referred to as “common knowledge.”

I’d like to think that the differences between guys and girls are common knowledge.

However, in our culture, things that were once commonly known are becoming commonly disputed. One thing the world is trying to convince us of is that if guys and girls are really “equal”, they are also “the same.”

When the fundamental differences between men and women are continually doubted and distorted, we need to stick to the teachings of the Bible. Quite simply—God made us male and female (Genesis 1:27).

There are many articles explaining the differences between guys and girls. But in this article, I want to attempt to answer one question: why are guys and girls different?

Why are we so different?

There is more than one reason, but in this article I want to focus on the three I think are the most important.

God made us different…

1. So we can fill the earth.

Perhaps the most obvious reason God made us different is for reproduction. God could have made a couple billion sexless people. But He chose not to.

Consequently, the very first command God gives mankind is to multiply and fill the earth.

Subjecting the world to God’s rule is the ultimate end of Christianity. That’s why we need more missionaries in the field. But that’s also why we need more parents, and why we need parents to have more children and raise them to follow Christ. Parents aren’t that different from missionaries.

Not everyone is called to be married. But the church is called to fill the earth with faithful subjects. I’m nineteen. If God wills it, I may be married in a couple of years. I ask myself: will I be faithful to God’s command to subject the world to his rule? Will I be part of filling the earth?

2. So one can be strong when the other is weak.

“Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.” (1 Peter 3:7).

Men and women are different. We have different minds, different styles, different likings, different habits, and different bodies. I hate that I need to say this in an article, but guys are (on average) physically stronger than girls. Girls are (on average) more emotionally intelligent than guys. Guys being physically stronger doesn’t take anything away from girls. And girls being more emotionally intelligent doesn’t take anything away from guys.

We are different, and being different inherently means having different strengths and weaknesses.

But our differences don’t mean we shouldn’t be friends.

Of course, we must be careful, because guy to girl friendships are different from guy to guy or girl to girl friendships. But in my experience, because guys and girls are so different, in a healthy friendship both guys and girls can learn from each other and grow spiritually. We can cancel out each other’s weakness.

3. To symbolize Christ’s love for us.

Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” (Ephesians 5:1-2).

Through the years, artists, poets, musicians, and writers have tried to grasp hold of love and portray it for what it is—without success. There is something behind true love that captures our imaginations.

How can love be so strong, yet so tender? It’s like a fire that can scourge a country, but also warm a family. It leaves us baffled!

I’m not talking simply about being in love. Of course, being in love is wonderful. But even secular writers realize that being in love is not everything that love has to offer. No, not even close. Ask any couple married longer than 10 years whether being in love brought them so far. Sure, they are an example of true love. But true love and being in love are two completely different things.

True love is deeper than simple passion. Christ’s love for us—now that’s true love! This kind of sacrificial love between a man and women in the context of marriage symbolizes the love between Christ and his church. True love is literally sacrificial, literally undying, and literally forever, and ever. What an honor it is to be loved by Jesus! What a privilege to symbolize his love through our love!

All Created in the Image of God

Even though God made us different, it’s important to remember that we’re all created “in the image of God” (Genesis 1:27). One half of the image is not better or worse than the other. On the contrary! Both halves are incomplete as an image when the other is absent.
G.K Chesterton illustrates this in a poem that says:

“If I set the sun beside the moon,
and if I set the land beside the sea,
and if I set the town beside the country,
and if I set the man beside the woman,
I suppose some fool would talk about one being better.”

One is not better than the other. That’s not why God made us different.

God made us different so that in unity, we can be strong. God made us different so that—like two pieces of a puzzle—we can come together and be what God intended us to be: followers of Christ.


Why Are Guys and Girls Different? is part one of a three part series on godly masculinity and femininity. Be sure to check out parts two and three.


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About the author

Pieter van Deventer

is a 19 year old child of God, living in Pretoria South Africa. He likes to read and he likes to drink coffee and he really likes to do both at the same time. He wanted to become a professional potato peeler, but that's not working out. He's currently a full-time theology student, and very excited about God's meaningful work through powerless men.

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By Pieter van Deventer
rebelling against low expectations

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